Dear Wilderness Child,

Angry

Hurt

Confused

Threatening

Untrustworthy

Desperate

Blaming

Non Communicative

Childish

Child, please forgive my emotional roller-coaster of reactions (see above) and my ineffective parenting choices. It was all I knew then. I was acting out of fear, guilt, and disappointment. I know I was in a lot of pain, but I also caused a lot of pain. 

I am learning a new way now.

Thanks for taking the first step – the call for help. Because of you, I chose to have a good hard look at me. How could I help if I, too, was hurting so much? Who would you look to if I could not guide? 

I’m now learning a new and better way to parent. 

I’m learning how to hold boundaries and love unconditionally. 

I’m learning how to respond instead of react. 

I’m learning how to follow through with consequences in a loving way.

I’m learning how to be the parent I want to be.

And I still make lots of mistakes… 

…just like you. 

…just like everyone.

Thanks for reminding me of the humanness we share and for challenging me. 

I am so grateful for how far we’ve come. I owe this growth to you.

Hi there [First Name]!

My other children were a piece of cake compared to our struggling son. They were easy, obedient, pleasant and fun to be around (well, most of the time). Our son who struggled was angry, hard, in constant conflict, and demanded so much more of us! 

But you know what? That demand has led to growth, tolerance, and loads of understanding… for him and me. I know and understand way more of life than I ever would have if all my kids were pleasant and easy. 

… and you just don’t learn much from pleasant and easy.

The truth is these struggling kids require more from us. And so what? So what if we have to get super uncomfortable to be of help to them? It’s ok, because you CAN do this. It’s not easy, but it’s very worth it.

My child was worth the hassle and so is yours. 

You can do this. And I can help.

Reach me at beth@bethhillmancoaching.com

-Beth


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